View Full Version : Kicked in the teeth.
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 07:37 PM
Firstly i need to apologise to anyone who i had arranged to swap buy visit or do anything with as recently my heads been all over the place following a break up from my fiance and finding out that while i was working or being told to go to goodwood breakfast club so she could have a girly day out with her mates she was actually sleeping in my bed with a 19yr old boy:baby:. how much more insulting can it get!!! He's only 10yrs older than our daughter and she thinks i'm gonna be happy to let him into the childrens life. not as long as i can breathe is he going anywhere near my children. Anyway rant over i'm back and focused on myself now.
Obviously not that focused else i'd have noticed i put this in the wrong header. should be off topic.
bad times:/ you think you know someone then something like that happens. youll meet someone better soon enough mate. hope everything else is okay
Hope it all works out mate, sounds like you've had a sh1tty time.
Nobrainer
02-07-12, 07:54 PM
That's just cr@ppy
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 07:54 PM
Well i got myself a new house and she can keep the old one. If you still have the yellow zs i think now is as good a time as any for me too bury my head in a nice project.
LozMachine
02-07-12, 08:07 PM
Nice thread title........and its what she needs............
thats good:)
yup shes still sat waiting on you, no rush though
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 08:12 PM
Nice thread title........and its what she needs............
sooooo tempting but i think it'll be him not her that gets a kick in the teeth if i ever see him.
talkingcars
02-07-12, 08:13 PM
I feel your pain, been there myself although it was with someone who was meant to be a friend.
My advice is to cross every tee and dot every eye. Make sure you sort every aspect of contact with your kids and house and everything.
Feel free to drop my a pmail if you want to ask anything and just to clear your head.
James
P.S. it gets better - 11 years on and I have a wonderful wife who indulgies my passions, all my kids dislike their mum and 4 of the 5 have left her to live with me at some point, the other one just moved in with her boyfriend.
Dude :) I know its not what you want to hear, but it could be much much worse. Trust me I know!!
WXM Matty
02-07-12, 08:16 PM
sooooo tempting but i think it'll be him not her that gets a kick in the teeth if i ever see him.
No offence but he's 19, he's not going to know what he's got himself into. His mates probably think he's a hero but give it a while and it wont be so 'fun' for him and she will be left alone.
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 08:17 PM
I just know she's going to try and claim half my business and still want me to pay maintenance on top as she has nothing now, i've worked my balls off getting to where i am today and i did it all for my family and this is how i get thanked.
I just know she's going to try and claim half my business and still want me to pay maintenance on top as she has nothing now, i've worked my balls off getting to where i am today and i did it all for my family and this is how i get thanked.
Sell the business to me for a tenner, then I'll hire you on as an employee... lol
Then give her her half (£5)
Then after a set time you buy the business back... lol
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 08:21 PM
No offence but he's 19, he's not going to know what he's got himself into. His mates probably think he's a hero but give it a while and it wont be so 'fun' for him and she will be left alone.
I know this i tried to tell her but she thinks he's prepared for family life. Nothing prepares you for that. the last thing i wanted at 19 was a child running around whilst i was nursing a hangover, i didn't even want a relationship at that age.
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 08:27 PM
lol that might not be such a bad idea zs
talkingcars
02-07-12, 08:29 PM
The other peice of advice is to only talk to her about stuff you have to, kids and money, do not offer advice or argue and if she says something don't argue back.
Let her think you're not interested, it is so cruel ;)
lol that might not be such a bad idea zs
You need to do it sooner rather than later if you do it... use the excuse you had to buy a new place etc :)
Pm me if you want a chat, I'll cheer you up by telling you 1% of what happened to me... :)
CourtneyyJamess
02-07-12, 08:38 PM
Dont worry mate' I Ditched My Miss's The Other day... fed Up of Constant Nagging And arguing' Thought not putting up with this soo Sent her packing!
& She Moaned about my car' That apparently Its My First LOVE Ha!
But Hey Ho'
Keep Your Chin Up Mate :)
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 08:38 PM
It's hard to be cruel as she just lost her grandad and her dads in intensive care but i'm not making it easy for her to spend time with him thats for sure.
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 08:41 PM
Haha that was one of her las comments to me, that if i wasn't at work i was outside polishing my car and gave it more attention than i gave her.
welshone
02-07-12, 08:50 PM
Bad news mate but you did say fiancee didn't you and not wife. In which case I don't see your business being a issue.
peterzs
02-07-12, 08:53 PM
Sorry to read this Adam, think I would take legal advice asap.
Treat her politely, remember the kids, easy to say but so hard to do.
The pain and anger will fade with time, the kids will be there for a long time.
She has made a big mistake and one day will realise what she has thrown away.
Bad news mate but you did say fiancee didn't you and not wife. In which case I don't see your business being a issue.
Common law... it means because they were living as a married couple she is entitled to ask for half...
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 08:54 PM
yeah we weren't married, luckily but she's been by my side since day 1 of the business and i'm sure when it comes to court she's going to claim she sacrificed a career for my business.
but if she cheated on you doesnt that go against her
but if she cheated on you doesnt that go against her
You'd think wouldn't you... 5 years later and im still going through the courts!!! Lol
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 09:01 PM
i thought that, turns out that your aloud to be unfaithful if your the woman in the relationship, basically it's the guy that gets shafted even if he's innocent.
i thought that, turns out that your aloud to be unfaithful if your the woman in the relationship, basically it's the guy that gets shafted even if he's innocent.
How true is this!!!!!!
SharronB
02-07-12, 09:11 PM
There's no such thing as "Common law marriage" and she will find out she has very few rights! Hope every thing works out for you
madness, lets hope so eh sharron(p.s. nice to see your still about with loz on here)
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 09:19 PM
As long as i've got the kids the rest of it's replacable.
Sorry to read this m8 but watch what yourr posting on here incase she knows your login or joins up
daytona365
02-07-12, 09:21 PM
I was always told I put my car before her, when I was married. Hey I was a car nut the day we met, so she should have known. Anyway, divorced for 6 years now. No hard feelings she just lost out to my cars. I live with my son, who is just as much a petrol head lol..................
Come on, a car doesn't get pmt, periods. Doesnt chuck your dinner in the bin etc.
You got a lot of people here, who understand. We like a little family..........Strange family mind .................
There's no such thing as "Common law marriage" and she will find out she has very few rights! Hope every thing works out for you
Sorry I have to disagree with you there... I have been heavily involved with family law for the last 6 years (5 years in court)
Common law is not a myth and is used all the time as a legal standpoint.
As for women having more rights, while I cannot go into my case in a public forum I can say if the situation was reversed it would have been resolved 5 year ago. The ONLY reason it is still going on now is that she is female!!
Anyway, much off topic now... and I am sure in Adams case it will all resolve itself amicably and quickly... at least I hope so for his sake!
Adamzs180
02-07-12, 09:24 PM
i don't think she'll register on here, she may try to use my log in though, have to remember to change my password.
andy-81
02-07-12, 09:28 PM
common law doesn't count for anything, she would only be entitled to the assets that had both yours and her signature on, eg: mortgages, business's and deeds to any other assets, joint bank acounts and savings. She can however claim maintanence for the kids until the kids reach 18 or leave home, which ever comes first.
She can't claim anything over a career sacrifice as that was her choice. She should count her self lucky you let her have the house! She will soon realize what a **** up she has made, believe me.
Any way mate i'm sorry to hear of your break up and hope it will lead you to greener pastures.
andys1981
02-07-12, 10:05 PM
sorry to hear your bad news ,hope it all works out for you mate
a 19 year old wont stick around for too long doing daddy duties when his mates are gonna be out on the **** every other night, she will come running back soon and then you have the upper hand, time is a healer and revenge is even sweeter!
Zippy Saloon
03-07-12, 04:57 AM
Bad news mate - you know where I am, assume you're still in same area?
Maxxed_Ross
03-07-12, 05:20 AM
my ex was doing exactly the same thing while I was working offshore. She was going out loads, going to the gym, out every weekend with "the girls" then wasn't at all interested in doing any of that when I was at home.
I snapped one trip I was out here and left her the day I landed. Left my PS2, hi-fi and a load of cothes behind but they can be replaced
Luckily the only ties I had with her was a pet Bearded Dragon... I miss it sometimes but I've got a far better horned Mountain Dragon now
I know your pain dude, things will get better no matter how much it feels like they won't
stamford
03-07-12, 07:18 AM
Sorry to hear this Adam. Stay calm and measure your responses, it'll help you in the long run. She will be alone soon as it'll fizz out like they all do and I bet you the house she will be pleading for you to return...............do not cave in. If she has done it this time when will the next one be?
Sorry to hear that this has happened - wish you all the good fortune in getting everything resolved.
lots of good advice so far though :)
theboynoz
03-07-12, 12:10 PM
Common law is not a myth and is used all the time as a legal standpoint.
I believe the common law marriage has recently been abollished, don't wanna drag that point out though as i normally get things wrong , and this is a rather sh1ty situation to find yourself in! Bad times.....
Best advice is to seek guidance from those in the know, be it solicitors or citizens advice etc..... And good luck getting things sorted mate!
Dan1971
03-07-12, 05:17 PM
Bad news mate ... Hope you get everything resoolved. Very sad when kids are involved ....
Sonic_160zr
03-07-12, 08:57 PM
Sorry to hear about this fella. Hope it works out for you and the kids. As everyone has said, the lad wont hang around for long. Be strong and be the better person. If you fancy a beer sometime gimmie a shout! (Im only up here for a few more weeks though!)
Cheers,
Matt
Sonic_160zr
04-07-12, 03:10 PM
Sorry to hear about this fella. Hope it works out for you and the kids. As everyone has said, the lad wont hang around for long. Be strong and be the better person. If you fancy a beer sometime gimmie a shout! (Im only up here for a few more weeks though!)
Cheers,
Matt
Me and the Mrs parted company today so I dont know how much longer I'll be oop north for. :( so might not be able to honour my offer of a beer!
Cheers,
Matt
peterzs
04-07-12, 04:09 PM
Sorry to hear Sonic, hope you can sort it out.
Adamzs180
08-07-12, 11:53 AM
quick response to the msg's left on here. firstly thanks for the advice. i turned up with a few vans to reclaim my belongings the other day and she had been drinking and having a "gathering" with friends to celebrate her engagement, which they can't tell his parents about and plan to get married in a secret ceremony next month. either this was said to get a reaction from me or they are a pair of idiots. anyway after 4 hours of abuse and backstabbing name calling i got my belongings, smiled and went on my merry way happy in the knowledge that she is loosing and she knows it.
Secondly to gary, i'm still in cheshire just moved to nantwich now, a much nicer house 3 beds garage and decent sized garden for the kids.
And finally sorry to hear your news sonic, who gets custody of the dog?
Anyway, I've got a meeting with solicitor tomorrow to discuss residency for the children so hopefully that will go well.
welshone
08-07-12, 12:14 PM
Sounds like a great gatecrash. Just keep your cool like you have been at whatever doesn't go the way you want it, it will help in the end.
andys1981
08-07-12, 02:14 PM
looks like she off to a good start with this dude drinking having them all over,she knows shes losing mate,she will get tired of having them all round etc,i can only see it getting worse for her im afraid
Lukeus101
08-07-12, 03:10 PM
Hope it all works out for you ok bud :)
Sonic_160zr
11-07-12, 08:31 PM
who gets custody of the dog?
Anyway.
Its her dog so she is taking it, she asked me if I wanted her on weekends :lol: but as that involves seeing her as well I might just pass. Found out yesterday she is already seeing someone else, good to know when you mean so much to people ehh... Just wish I wasnt stuck in the same house as her for the next week.
Sounds to me like she has lost the plot, good job holding your head high and I hope your meeting went well.
Cheers,
Matt
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